Well, Someone's Gotta Do It.

Taking on a task such as fast-tracking your way to an Olympic Games is not the easiest thing in the world, it turns out.

The road to the top may not be easy, or linear. It may be a lonely road, and it may cause you pain. The road to the top is paved with blood, sweat, and tears, as is widely known. But man, if you can stick it out and find the will to soldier on, I have zero doubts that the view will be amazing. 

I am writing in pink today because pink is my happy. It lifts my spirits when they're down and it is the color of my mood when I am happy already. My nails are pink too. It's been a good few days! 

I guess my readers are curious to hear what has been happening with my new steed, the fantastic Right Tyme. I will tell you what's been happening: magic. Ever since my first ride on him since he arrived in PA, he has improved. For one, he has more pep to him than when we initially tried him in Florida-perhaps the cold air has invigorated him? Another thing is Brendan tells me each ride that he's looking more packaged and fancier. And lastly, I no longer always feel as though I am going to fly off at every 'up' post when we trot! I am finding my seat and legs. I liken Right Tyme's motion to stepping on a really wobbly boat in a really stormy sea for your first ever nautical excursion. I mean only that his amount of suspension and movement and my relative inexperience with FEI horses makes me think of having sea legs! But I'm getting them. 
Yesterday we had our first rough run-through of my tests. Brendan has an incredible eye for test riding, and was extremely helpful. After my first try, he said "Wow, he looks really damn fancy." And pointed out places which will be tougher and places which should be highlights for us. His thoughts were extended trot, serpentines, freewalk and working trot work should score 8s or more, where walk pirouettes and 10m circles need some extra work. I was finding the day difficult because recently Right Tyme has gone back to his less forward ways, and a lack of energy or impulsion is likely the hardest thing for me to overcome. But Brendan said he is going to continue to ride and train him in conjunction with me, and I am confident that that will keep him sharper! Closing thoughts from yesterday was that our first try probably would have earned us a qualifying score, but that there was a ton of room for improvement, which is phenomenal! 
Now, I am proud to say that after this first month or so of sports performance training at the Nook, what a difference I am seeing! My legs have toned right up, I'm looking taller and leaner, and I have more coordination. My balance has improved and I am ALMOST able to say that my workouts have grown easy. Almost, but that's not quite the truth. Either way, my gym trainers are graduating me to anew and  certainly awful workout next week. As soon as we reach a level of ease in one routine, they are there to shake us up and make us hurt again! (Athletic hurt meaning feel the buuuuurn). Splendid. *Note the sarcasm* I am not complaining because a pair of breeches that were given to me over the summer which I could just barely clasp now have room in the waist and aren't impossible to move around in! Hah!

This is the truth!

Tomorrow is the first day of the first Para CDI of 2015 in Wellington, and I am decidedly disappointed I was unable to compete! But, I am more decidedly ecstatic to know I've got a coach with a master game plan. Speaking of, Brendan and I will fly to Wellington this Saturday to arrive in time to spectate the freestyles of my teammates, and then to audit a very important clinic geared toward educating para coaches, which takes place early next week. Time to see and be seen in the scene, to meet important folks and to show that we are serious. I love everything that I am learning; the game, you know. Fascinating. I will finish this post with the 12 inevitabilities of success, as scripted by Donald Duck..I mean Trump...Which I like to read for inspiration. Sometimes in my head I even read it in Donald Duck's voice. But I digress. So, when I am feeling pain, or loneliness, or frustration, these points help me to keep looking toward the end goal:

1. You will lose some friends
2. You will think you're going crazy
3.You will feel pain
4. You will almost talk yourself out of it (hundreds of times)
5. You will lose money
6. You will cry before you get it
7. Your family and friends will discourage you
8. You will doubt yourself (thousands of times)
9. You will develop weird habits
10.People will give you grief for no reason
11.It will all be worth it
12. Then suddenly, they all want to be your best friend

I can personally attest to having encountered at least 9 of these things thus far. But I know I'll never give up! Now I am in serious need of some sun and sand-South Florida, here we come! And I'd like to shout a huge "GOOD LUCK!!!" to my teammates who will ride at the CPEDI3* this weekend. May the lords of the dance be with you all!

County

A saddle may arguably be the single most important investment one can make in their riding career. Saddles, like cars, are a combination of function, comfort, style and durability. Saddles, also like cars, can cost a small fortune, ESPECIALLY when you (rightfully) choose a brand of high quality and reputation. 

As far as saddles go, there are a zillion makes and models, styles, fits, etc. It is absolutely best to research and compare different ones. I am personally of the belief that the comfort of the horse is the most important factor in saddle shopping. The rider needs to be comfortable and secure, of course and able to hold correct position, but the horse's back is the most at risk. Thus, I always advise to find the best fit for the horse first and foremost and not worry too much if your comfort is a little compromised. 

before our County dreams came true

As far as saddles go, County Saddlery is a cut above most American brands, and are widely known for the benefits to both horse and rider. My coach, Brendan Curtis *USDF Gold Medalist* swears by this brand, and steers all his clients toward them when they are in need of a new one. He's told me that over the 20+ years of his riding career, he's tried many a saddle and he will always go to County first, as they have met every possible standard and never steered him wrong. 

As luck would have it, County Saddlery agreed to sponsor me with one of their saddles to aid me in trying to make the 2016 Paralympic Team. I was so pleasantly surprised when after I wrote to the company asking for a saddle, the president, Gene Freeze responded to me in the affirmative! I had been concerned about finding a way to purchase a saddle for my new gorgeous steed, Right Tyme, because with a horse of this caliber, you want to do every detail right. I knew I wanted a County, but wasn't going to be able to afford one anytime soon. So, on a whim, I reached out to the company through their website's "contact us" section, explained my intent, who I am, what my accomplishments are thus far, and where I am now, and went right ahead and asked for a saddle. It took very little time for Mr. Freeze to reply, and he was very complimentary and wonderfully helpful. 

Shortly thereafter, an appointment was set up for County rep Roxanne Bowman to come to Flintrock with demo saddles to try to fit my boy and me with a saddle. Lo and behold, we found a match! Our fitting was today, and Roxanne's first guess was the magic one. I's a 16.5" Perfection-my personal favorite of the brand's line, a medium tree, and it is gorgeous. it feels like it just sucks me into the horse's back and locks me in, and it's unbelievably comfortable. My handsome boy took the opportunity to act up a bit today, but nothing terrible, and I felt perfectly stable anyway! 

Just to put the icing on the cake, Roxanne threw in a gorgeous no-slip pad as an added gift. It sports the County logo so that I can show off my awesome sponsors at shows. They adjusted the flocking on sight to fit my boy, and once he muscles up and reaches his top fitness again, we will be unstoppable!! I am so honored, and so grateful to be backed by this proven and respected brand, and I will happily advocate to everyone who's looking for saddles! What a day (and MONTH) it's been. THANKS COUNTY SADDLERY!!!

The best of the best

Spooky Nook Sports

I don't dare talk back to these guys! (But I love them) 

Many people don't consider riding to be a real sport. It's understandable-after all, when riding well, it does appear that the rider is merely a passenger while the horse does all the work. However, in order to achieve an international level of riding, it takes an astronomical amount of strength, flexibility, "feel," quick reflexes, and utter control over your entire body. One must easily be able to isolate muscle groups while managing to think about a test or course etc, and aren't these components consistent with all other extreme sports? Herein, I feel, lies the issue with our sport-especially in America. Too many people consider riding something that any person can go do. This is where horses suffer at times. Imagine the discomfort a hose has to endure if a very larger person with minimal coordination or balance hops on and starts flapping about?
I strongly advocate a high level of fitness, and truly feel riding is a privilege and not a right. I don't wish to offend anyone, but I've seen too much of vastly overweight people pounding on a rose's back, and its painful to watch! Please, be kind enough to at least be in a healthy body weight range before attempting to gallop off into the sunset. * #endrant
In order to ride at a very competitive level, then, it makes sense that one must strive to have a superior level of fitness and all aforementioned attributes, no? It is ESPECIALLY important for para athletes to go the extra mile when not in the saddle. We have less to work with than our able bodied counterparts, and must maximize what we have! 
Which brings me to this massive news that I'm very proud of:
In Manheim, PA (about 8 miles from my apartment) is the largest indoor sports complex in North America. Spooky Nook Fitness is home of the USA women's Olympic field hockey team, and they are renowned as one of the very top programs for turning out professional level elite athletes in many sports, including NFL, MLB pro tennis, pro volleyball, track and field, pro soccer, and the list goes on. They have top trainers of strength/fitness/agility/speed, who customize workouts for athletes who are attempting to go pro. They also focus on young athletes, molding them for futures as stars in their chosen arena. 
I have a close friend who pointed me to 'The Nook' to try to gain them as a sponsor. I figured why not, and I went in and deposited my brochure with little hope of hearing back. I was promptly contacted by the head of sponsorship department who stated that though they could not offer me financial backing, they would like to offer me full sponsorship of their elite pro athlete training program. 
A better thing could not have fallen into my lap!
I started there about 3 weeks ago, and let me tell you: this is not for the faint of heart! It is so hard that I can't remember a day where some muscle group didn't hurt, and there have been a handful of days where I sincerely didn't know how I was going to physically be capable of walking out of the Nook after a workout. 
*Keep in mind, this level of activity is harder for me on the premise that half my body has been working at only 50% or less for the last 15 years!* I will outline what they make me do. The workout takes 2 hours and I am expected  5 days a week. Right off the bat I was asked if I wanted to be treated any differently (they already knew the answer) and I workout with about 7 guys gearing up for the NFL draft, one girl who is going for pro tennis, and a couple pro baseball guys, and I am absolutely expected to keep up. Here's what a typical day looks like:
10 min warmup at full speed on elliptical

shuffle runs: (60yds down and back, meaning 120yds total 4x)

walking: as fast as possible 120yds perfectly straight 3/4inch line, one foot directly in front of the other (4x)

over/unders: a ballet bar with 2 heights of bar (like a paddock fence) that i straddle the lower bar and have to squat to duck under the top bar (so going between) back and forth 3x16

single leg hamstring holds: like a reverse plank, I lie on my back with feet elevated on lower bar and one leg at a time i lift my body so it's a straight line angle off the floor. Each leg I have to hold for 45sec. x3.

glute raises: feet up with knees bent, I have to raise my hips high up while squeezing everything down the back side. 3x12

ab/aductor: lying on my side I have to do straight legs apart as high as possible (abductor) then cross the top leg with knee bent and lift the bottom leg up off the floor (adductor) and do both 3x12 on each side. 

abs: leg lifts 3x20 between 30sec bicycling hold(3x30sec)

firehydrants: On hands and knees I have to raise one leg at a time from the hip outward with knee bent like a dog peeing on a hydrant. 3x12 on both sides

kickbacks: on hands and knees I have to kick straight out backwards with heel going high as possible toward the ceiling. 3x12 each side

Birdogs: On hands and knees I have to raise the opposing arm and leg  straight out in front and behind at the same time like a hunting dog. 3x12-you cannot imagine how hard it is for me to balance on left arm!!! But now I can.:)

Sorry for the novel, but now you can see why I have been absolutely wiped out, because after all that, then I get to go ride! And then all I want to do is sleep! 
I can't say I love the butt-whooping, but I GRATLY appreciate it, and the noticeable progress keeps me going. I've cut off a whole half hour from the date that I began to today! That is something to be proud of. I'm positive I would not be able to ride Right Tyme if I didn't have this program in place. Lets just say I hibernate on the weekends! 

Proud to be sponsored by this world class facility

I Apologize for the Delay but....

...There is a very good explanation as to why I've been MIA for the past month. My fingers (and the rest of my body in it's entirety) have been too knackered to so much as type a sentence. And if that's the case how do you think my brain feels? No, no, no. It's just that I've only got 5 fingers to work with and they're responsible for absolutely everything, and sometimes they just can't go on. When I tell you why, you will understand.

Now, I've had three MASSIVE, COLOSSAL, ASTOUNDING things occur since  December 1st. It's going to take quite a bit of explaining for each, so I am going to detail each development separately. I shall start with the BIGGEST and most EXCITING, and follow with the others in the next couple days. 

1. I GOT A HORSE

2.I'm sponsored by Spooky Nook Sports

3. I'm sponsored by COUNTY SADDLERY (!!!!)


Ok. I will start with the obvious biggest piece-my new horse. After Thanksgiving, I was on the way back to PA with my brother and his girlfriend, thinking about the fact that it was December 1st and I still didn't have a horse to compete for the upcoming season. Brendan had told me several weeks ago that if by Dec 1 we didn't have a horse, then most likely 2016 would be unattainable. I had come to accept the thought and turn my vision then to 2020 Olympics. We were driving and I received a call from USPEA president Hope Hand, who without any lead in, said "We got you a horse!"
Insert shock/disbelief/mindblow/elation/reeling here.
She said he was from Canada Olympian Evi Strasser's Good Tyme stables, and had competed through I1 with 70%, and had been donated to Vinceremos Therapeutic Riding Center to be paired with a para equestrian, and they thought he and I would make a great match. The only other information I got from that call was that he was 16.1 Oldenburg, chestnut and dull to the leg. 
The following week was rife with butterfly excitement on my part and refusal to bounce up and down with me on Brendan's. Ever the charmer, my coach airs on the side of pessimism, but who can blame him-the horse business is a crooked one after all, and we love him anyway! Luckily, he was not so disbelieving that he declined to have a look at this lead with me. Within the next week, I had us booked for a weekend jaunt to sunny S.W. Florida  to follow through. Florida was, shall we say, a success? I honestly haven't the words, but let me just say that when my coach starts getting excited about something, you know it's a bit beyond phenomenal. 
As if fate was quite literally shaking me by the shoulder's, the horse's name is 'Right Tyme.' He'd been imported from Germany as a preium  stallion, and gelded only because he was arguing with other studs in Ms. Strasser's barn. He is sired by Royal Olymp, the second most expensive horse ever auctioned in Vechta. Royal Olymp had none other than the renowned Rubenstein as sire. Right Tyme's dam line is from Donnerhall. Take it from me, these are champion bloodlines. 
What a striking horse! burnished chestnut and covered in dapples, he stands tall  and alert, with a stripe down his face, 3 socks and rich burgundy mane and tail. He looks like a stallion, with an impressive crest and traditional thick Oldenburg bone. He has a very alert and maybe mischievous eye. He's certainly a head turner! Friendly as they come, this horse thrives on attention. He basically tried to crawl in my lap the first time we met!
Brendan had him perfectly figured out from the moment he mounted of course. He had him looking like a Grand Prix horse within minutes. And when I got on, I may as well have floated away. He isn't what I'd call an "easy ride," he has that stallion trait of shutting down  when you apply too much pressure, and he's not the easiest to move forward. But oh my, when he goes, it's like a cloud. I felt that we never really touched the ground. This horse does't know what it is to be on the forehand, and instead, even cantering with literally zero contact, he kept his frame and his pace the entire time. I was just a passenger. I've never felt movement like that. Brendan later told me the horse rides just like his stallion, Flavius, in that they need some convincing, but he also said this boy was a stroke of pure luck. To make a long story short(er), B and I wholeheartedly jumped on the opportunity to work with this awesome horse, and after lengthy talks of strategy and next moves, agreed to bring him up north with us for bootcamp before heading south for the season in february. 
We arrived home Monday after what ended up being a fun and thrilling weekend, and By Friday morning, our new partner arrived at Flintrock, where he is borrowing a blanket until I can get him some of his own because the poor thing is entirely body clipped which looks awesome but leaves him an ice pop! I hung out with him a lot today and he was an instant barn favorite. Very playful and outgoing. I am beyond excited to go to work with him monday and I have no doubts we are going to do great things! And once the princess, Clever heals up fully I will be blessed to have 2 outstanding equine partners to shine with! 
I' like to take this opportunity to give ENORMOUS THANKS to Susan Guinan of Vinceremos Therapeutic Riding Center, for allowing me use of this lovely animal, Hope Hand-president of the USPEA for choosing me to pair with him, Sarah Jancik,who donated Right Tyme rather than selling him, Kelly Layne, Australian WEG team member for giving the horse years of correct and advanced training, Evi Strasser for giving Right Tyme the Right start! And, as ever, USDF gold medalist Brendan Curtis of Curtis Dressage, LLC for taking this journey with me, believing in and supporting me, and being a coach who is at the same time fantastically fun to be around, AND a cool, calculating competitor whom I entirely trust with my education. THIS IS THE BREAK I NEEDED!!! I will share the other parts of this mind boggling past couple weeks shortly. 

Check out my horse with Kelly Layne up doing breathtaking Prix St. Georges! 
http://youtu.be/QvSH4xjMBik


And here you can see his lovely dapples:

Right Tyme, indeed!!

Happy Thanksgiving!

It's been a long time since I lived in close proximity to any family, but there's nothing nicer than that during the holiday season. As I type this post, I'm in the warm and buzzing living room of my dad's farmhouse, along with his wit, his best friend, and my brother and his girlfriend. There's fresh fallen deep poofy sparkling snow, the glow of lamplight, a football game and the smell of dozens of edible things being prepared to feast on. The dogs and cats are in our midst, making sure they are not overlooked in the cheerful gathering. I miss my mom and rest of the extended family, but am so happy she is where she is! 
I literally can't wait to ride again. The thought of taking 5 days off is unappealing, but I know I need a mental and physical reset. So I'll take this time to regroup, strategize and come back swinging next week. I will be starting training double time, with much exciting news there, but more about that later! Tonight is about being thankful for the abundance of love and support and good things I've encountered throughout my life. So, Kick back, relax, fill your minds and hearts with cheer and dig in! I'll leave you all with this bit of Turkey Day humor:

HOW TO COOK A TURKEY:

Step 1) Buy a turkey
Step 2) Have a glass of wine
Step 3) Stuff turkey
Step 4) Have a glass of wine
Step 5) Put turkey in oven
Step 6) Relax and have a glass of wine
Step 7) Turk the bastey
Step 8) Wine of glass another get
Step 9) Hunt for meat thermometer
Step 10) Glass yourself another pour of wine
Step 11) Bake the wine for 4 hours
Step 12) Take the oven out of the turkey
Step 13) Tet the sable
Step 14) Grab another wottle of bine
Step 15) Turk the carvey!


Thank you all for taking an interest in what I have to say. Wishing you all a wonderful holiday season and lots of love!

Making Cranberry Juice

God help the folks in the world who were not blessed with a sense of humor.
I haven't led what you'd call an easy life. I've had a roller coaster ride of ups and downs, and when I hit the downs, the only way I can get through is by laughing at the absurdity  of life. I will never forget my very dearest friend's wise advice during one of my stressful spells: she said to me, with an absolutely deadpan face, "When life gives you lemons, you make cranberry juice and surprise the F-*#! out of the world!" 
Well, that incidentally surprised the F-*#! out of ME, and took me so off guard it caused immediate giggles. I quite like that idea. I've never been a follower, more of an oddball, march to my own drum type..so making cranberry juice out of lemons appealed to me just fine.

When I first regained consciousness in the hospital after having a stroke, I hated everything. I was so sad. I felt that it was pointless to have survived at all. I could no longer move, the thing I loved over anything else in the world. Me, the pint sized athlete who never walked anywhere, but instead danced, bounced, sprinted, flitted, who loved to climb into the tip tip top of the tallest trees around, the one who could outrun all the boys in my age group, took 3 types of dance, karate, gymnastics, and swam for days in the summer time, was now reduced to a lump in a wheelchair. I couldn't walk more than a few steps without exhaustion (or tripping) I needed canes, wheelchair, leg braces. I was embarrassed to be what I'd become. I lost nearly all the friends I'd been close to prior to the accident. I hated seeing myself. For a longer time than I care to admit, I wished I hadn't pulled through. 
It's painful to recall these memories, many of which are deep beneath the surface but still haunt my subconscious at times. I think of the trauma I put my family through and it still brings tears. It was so so long ago but somehow it's still like yesterday. I am absolutely certain that my family is what saved me. The amount of love and support they gave (still give)..well, let's just say, I couldn't leave them. 
Things are infinitely different now, but there's still the little girl inside who feels like she lost herself.
Horses brought back my light. Slowly at first, because in the beginning, when riding was physical therapy, I resented the fact that I couldn't do what I'd done before in the saddle. But that feeling is what then propelled me to change myself. I didn't like who I was, so a fire ignited in me to make myself into someone I DID want to be. It's been a wearisome path, but the struggle is what makes humans feel alive. Facing death, facing a tragedy as huge as what I did, sweetens the good parts of life far beyond what the average person experiences. I honestly think that going through that loss makes me appreciate positive things to a heightened extreme, and everything that I overcome becomes a source of self esteem. 
I've been in a low swing for a couple weeks now. I'm under an astronomical amount of pressure to acquire a new horse in time to compete with the team this winter in Wellington, and the time has come down to the wire. I've all but stopped sleeping, which of course messes with your sanity. 
I've always been a bit dramatic. I don't do shades of gray, I don't do things by halves, I have a voracious life force that causes me to be extremely passionate. About EVERYTHING. Which is why I can come across as high strung, or anxious. Honestly, I just feel things more acutely than most people. And that is why, I just have to keep thinking of those cremons (lemonberries?) and keep surprising the  F-*#! out of the world!!  Also, the off color jokes that constantly fly around the barn do wonders to lift the spirits.

And now the song is stuck in my head...

P.S. My friend Hannah at the barn, who is deathly afraid of fish..(???) got upset today when I said something about tuna. As she walked by, I said, "It's not my fault you have FISHSUES!!!!!"
And solidified the fact that I am a comic genius.

PLUG IN

One of my previous coach's favorite phrases when teaching was, "plug in." It was what she would tell us when we needed to sit deeper into the horse, or when there was too much daylight between our butts and the saddles. It is an odd thing to say and made us all giggle, but man that lesson really sunk in today.
Enter Ringo, Le Crazy Bucking Bronco of the Century!
It started out like a normal day. Brendan had another lesson going on so I was doing my own thing whilst he taught the other student and kept half an eye on me. Ringo didn't feel off or ornery, and I started out to the right lead canter. Things immediately took a certain turn when the thoroughbred let out a buck and squeal, and the situation escalated quickly. I ignored the naughty behavior, calmly insisted he get back under control, and revisited the issue. We had several of what I think are the best canter transitions that I've ever had on this horse, with the result being the most uphill and collected right lead I've had. Then, Ringo proceeded to lurch his head down and swing it around, equal and absolutely take off on a bucking spree. 
I mean rodeo status. We went up, we went down, we spun and had all 4 feet off the ground, we grunted and kicked and made piggy squeals. Ultimate horse tantrum. He was most decidedly trying to launch me into the stratosphere. Without doubt, the nuttiest meltdown I've ever had the pleasure of riding. I think I counted at least 6 bucks in a row with crow hops, half rears and head swinging in between, and guess what?

I. Stayed. On. 

I lost count after about 5 of these

I'm telling you it was like being in a trance. I literally just sat there, plugged into his saddle, not even the SLIGHTEST imbalance. I could have put mascara on if I'd had some. My heart rate didn't even change. We just went merrily bucking and ripping around the perimeter of the arena (Brendan all agog and trying to figure out where he should stand to catch me) And I sat there and may as well have done the royal wave. I somehow even managed to avoid all 5 jumps set up without crashing or jumping. Controlled chaos at it's best. 

Lady Boss.

When I'd regained control, the mother of the other girl riding was just staring at me and said "My god I can't believe you stayed on. Are you O.K?!" I just shrugged my thanks and rode on, back to right lead canter. 

Unfortunately, it seems Ringo may have reached the end of his dressage career. Brendan had me quit early, not because he was worried about my safety but because apparently what caused this explosion seems to have been pain. Oddly enough I didn't feel the slightest offness in the horse (and I'm EXTREMELY sensitive to lameness) but Brendan and the other spectators informed me that Ringo was SEVERELY short in the right hind, and it looked to be stifle related. I felt quite badly that I didn't feel his pain, but I am exceedingly proud that I remained utterly calm and unflappable during the episode. I was more amused than anything, and I never once thought to punish the horse. So I walked him and sent him back to his stall. Brendan said I'll ride him tomorrow and have someone watch from the ground to see what he looks like, and we'll decide then what to do. I really hope he's not lame and it's just soreness from work that can be rested off and alleviated! I don't see how the riding I've put on him thus far could have done damage, we've been very lenient and only working on bare basics. Poor guy! No wonder he wanted to send me to China. 

Honestly though, today was phenomenal for me because I found out I am not only a tight enough rider to sit through a rodeo show but that I'm no longer afraid of bucking! One year ago, a bucking horse would put me in tears, ready to bail, absolutely quit. Today I nearly laughed. It didn't bother me even a tiny bit. And that, my friends, is huge! So thanks Cyndy, for making me plug in my butt. (To the saddle). It clearly works! 

Balance is the key to life. And riding.